Asheville Tax Day Tea Party
Non-partisan Movement to Repeal the Pork!
Date: Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Time: 4:30
Location: sidewalk in front of Asheville City Hall and Buncombe County Courthouse
check out www.Ashevilleteaparty.com
And www.Newamericanteaparty.com
Friday, March 27, 2009
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Come Together
I’ve been working most all my life. The summer I was thirteen I was digging trenches with my step-grandfather, and at fourteen, when I was old enough to legally work, I flipped burgers. It wasn’t that I had to work; my parents took care of me. I liked money. I wanted my own. Then I got pregnant (which cost me my burger job) and it was no longer a choice. I gave birth a month after I turned fifteen, and I’ve been working ever since. My daughter’s father was worthless and couldn’t be relied upon for help. Over the years, when I could locate him, I threatened him with bodily harm if he didn’t pony up some dough to buy diapers or pay for daycare, and he did. Until he could escape again. I just didn’t have time to chase him. In seventeen years, he may have given me a total of a thousand dollars. My parents helped me a great deal, and I worked.
When I was eighteen, a friend and I rented a little duplex apartment. I was waiting tables, making just enough to pay the bills. My roommate had to go to Chicago for a couple months, and wouldn’t be able to cover her half, so my boyfriend at the time agreed to stay with me while she was gone and pay her portion. He left me to shack up with some old girlfriend just as all the bills were coming due. I panicked. I didn’t want to ask my parents for money, they’d done enough. A friend suggested welfare. I wanted no part of that, never had. Not even Medicaid when I was pregnant. He told me I was the kind of person it was designed for, a working mother who just needs help temporarily, until I got back on my feet. Eventually, I relented.
I choked down my pride and went to the social services office. There I was informed that my $200 a week in tips was too much income, they couldn’t do anything for me. I was flabbergasted.
“What am I supposed to do? I can’t make any less without quitting my job!” I cried.
“There you go.” The social worker said.
“You’re telling me that if I quit my job the government will pay my bills, but if I do everything I can for myself, I’m on my own? Are you serious?”
“That’s how it works.”
I was irate. “No thanks.” I stormed out.
This is not verbatim; I seem to recall pitching a huge hissy fit in that office and using some colorful language to demonstrate how outraged I was, but you get the gist.
Up to that point, I don’t think I ever thought much about the government; I just had a vague notion of a bunch of old men in suits sitting around smoking cigars and making up new laws. They had no effect on my life. But now they were to be scorned for their absurdity, and definitely not to be trusted.
Over the next couple of days, I discovered a way to make plenty of money. I wasn’t hurting anyone, didn’t steal anything, and I was able to comfortably support myself and my daughter. For the next nine years I operated on the fringes of the law, doing construction and restaurant work a few months a year to have something to show the IRS. I wasn’t able to have a meaningful romantic relationship, but I didn’t mind. I never met anyone worth giving up my money for. Until five years ago.
I fell in love with a guy I met in a bar, and I gave it up and never looked back. I got a job in a casino making decent money and we got married. We bought a house, got some dogs, and lived like a normal family. My husband had worked full time in college, paid his own way. He has a good job. We have a bunch of credit cards and a substantial mortgage, and we’ve always paid them. On time, every time. We pay our taxes, even when they doubled the tax value of our house last year, and raised the property taxes accordingly. My Dad moved in with me in January of last year, and helped me start a business as a tile contractor. I got work right away, and soon the business was prospering. It’s back-breaking work, but it’s satisfying to create something out of nothing, to make a house look beautiful, and the money is great.
And then all of the sudden, it screeched to a halt. Nobody’s building anything! No one can get a loan to buy anything! The last house I put tile in is still sitting on the market, to this day. It turns out that the banks in this country have royally screwed us all. Apparently they’ve been extending credit to people they should’ve known wouldn’t be able to pay it back, and now that they’re not paying it back, the banks are in trouble. Big trouble. They can’t loan ANYONE money now, bringing our economy to a standstill. They cried for help, and the Bush administration responded with a bailout of $700 billion. AIG executives immediately took a much deserved $400,000 vacation, and their mulit-million dollar bonuses. Don’t forget their bonuses!
Well, this unbelievable amount of taxpayer money didn’t do the trick. Things have only gotten worse. I can’t imagine why. It makes perfect sense to pour massive amounts of money into the hands of the very same people who brought the American economy to its knees! They’ll be able to fix it if we just give them some money! Right? RIGHT?
Of course not. That’s asinine. They’re irresponsible. They wielded a great deal of power in this country, and they abused it wholeheartedly. I cannot begin to fathom the so-called logic behind this corporate welfare. Oh wait, it does ring a bell though. I do seem to recall from my encounter with the government that the policy is this: If you do the wrong thing, and then sit on your ass and ask the government to pay your bills, they’ve got your back. If you do the right thing, they’ve got nothing for ya.
I am now flipping burgers again, for $7.25 an hour. There’s no construction work to be done, and I’m lucky to even have this job, or so they tell me. Funny, I don’t feel lucky. Hundreds of dollars worth of tools sit rusting in my carport, useless. Bank executives continue to jet around in private planes, flaunting their billions, OUR billions, in our faces, and every time I ask ‘Would you like fries with that?’ another little piece of my soul dies.
A couple of months ago, out of the blue, the interest rates on our credit cards doubled, and the limits were lowered to just above the balance. We hadn’t done anything different; we still paid all those bills on time, as hard as it’s been. When we asked them why, they told us it was because the economy was bad and other people weren’t paying their bills, so they had to make up the money somewhere. I’m not kidding. They outright admitted that, I have it in writing. Are they serious? Do they honestly think that after all these years of faithfully paying those payments, doing what we’re supposed to do, that they can turn on us, ruin our credit rating, cause the economy to collapse, in turn costing me my livelihood, and we’re going to cover their asses? I don’t think so. No sir, not me. We kept up our end of the deal, but what they’re trying to do to us now amounts to extortion. They’ll never see another penny from us. Guess that little plan backfired, huh?
Now the new administration in Washington is throwing more money at them. I can’t even believe it. It boggles the mind. I filed my taxes last week. They want another $700 from me. They taxed the everloving hell out of my husband all year, but it’s not enough. They want more, more, more! Those banks have got to get their money!
Well, they’re not getting it from me. I get taxed every time I turn around, and I’ve given all I’m going to give. I don’t even let my lazy brother-in-law freeload off of us; I’m certainly not supporting a bunch of billionaire bankers. No. Hell no.
I have had enough.
I think a lot of people have had enough of this. It is our duty as American citizens to keep the federal government in check. When they get too big for their britches, it’s our job to even the playing field. This has nothing to do with political parties or social issues. Forget all those differences between Republicans and Democrats, Libertarians and Independents. It doesn’t matter if you disagree with me about gay marriage or censorship. Nobody’s going to care who’s sleeping with whom, or who’s reading what if we’re all struggling just to feed ourselves! Uncle Sam has his hand in all our pockets, stealing from the poor to give to the rich. It’s time we come together as Americans, stand as one and put the old men in Washington in their place. Their job is to serve the people of this country, to represent what we want. And I don’t think anybody wants to work to support giant corporations who should have gone under due to their own negligence and poor business practices. Instead of being led like sheep to the slaughter, let us all stand up and let them know how we feel about this. I know I won’t be handing out any more money for them to waste this year. And on April 15th, I’ll be protesting as loudly as possible. We should all be doing that.
All those in favor, say aye!
When I was eighteen, a friend and I rented a little duplex apartment. I was waiting tables, making just enough to pay the bills. My roommate had to go to Chicago for a couple months, and wouldn’t be able to cover her half, so my boyfriend at the time agreed to stay with me while she was gone and pay her portion. He left me to shack up with some old girlfriend just as all the bills were coming due. I panicked. I didn’t want to ask my parents for money, they’d done enough. A friend suggested welfare. I wanted no part of that, never had. Not even Medicaid when I was pregnant. He told me I was the kind of person it was designed for, a working mother who just needs help temporarily, until I got back on my feet. Eventually, I relented.
I choked down my pride and went to the social services office. There I was informed that my $200 a week in tips was too much income, they couldn’t do anything for me. I was flabbergasted.
“What am I supposed to do? I can’t make any less without quitting my job!” I cried.
“There you go.” The social worker said.
“You’re telling me that if I quit my job the government will pay my bills, but if I do everything I can for myself, I’m on my own? Are you serious?”
“That’s how it works.”
I was irate. “No thanks.” I stormed out.
This is not verbatim; I seem to recall pitching a huge hissy fit in that office and using some colorful language to demonstrate how outraged I was, but you get the gist.
Up to that point, I don’t think I ever thought much about the government; I just had a vague notion of a bunch of old men in suits sitting around smoking cigars and making up new laws. They had no effect on my life. But now they were to be scorned for their absurdity, and definitely not to be trusted.
Over the next couple of days, I discovered a way to make plenty of money. I wasn’t hurting anyone, didn’t steal anything, and I was able to comfortably support myself and my daughter. For the next nine years I operated on the fringes of the law, doing construction and restaurant work a few months a year to have something to show the IRS. I wasn’t able to have a meaningful romantic relationship, but I didn’t mind. I never met anyone worth giving up my money for. Until five years ago.
I fell in love with a guy I met in a bar, and I gave it up and never looked back. I got a job in a casino making decent money and we got married. We bought a house, got some dogs, and lived like a normal family. My husband had worked full time in college, paid his own way. He has a good job. We have a bunch of credit cards and a substantial mortgage, and we’ve always paid them. On time, every time. We pay our taxes, even when they doubled the tax value of our house last year, and raised the property taxes accordingly. My Dad moved in with me in January of last year, and helped me start a business as a tile contractor. I got work right away, and soon the business was prospering. It’s back-breaking work, but it’s satisfying to create something out of nothing, to make a house look beautiful, and the money is great.
And then all of the sudden, it screeched to a halt. Nobody’s building anything! No one can get a loan to buy anything! The last house I put tile in is still sitting on the market, to this day. It turns out that the banks in this country have royally screwed us all. Apparently they’ve been extending credit to people they should’ve known wouldn’t be able to pay it back, and now that they’re not paying it back, the banks are in trouble. Big trouble. They can’t loan ANYONE money now, bringing our economy to a standstill. They cried for help, and the Bush administration responded with a bailout of $700 billion. AIG executives immediately took a much deserved $400,000 vacation, and their mulit-million dollar bonuses. Don’t forget their bonuses!
Well, this unbelievable amount of taxpayer money didn’t do the trick. Things have only gotten worse. I can’t imagine why. It makes perfect sense to pour massive amounts of money into the hands of the very same people who brought the American economy to its knees! They’ll be able to fix it if we just give them some money! Right? RIGHT?
Of course not. That’s asinine. They’re irresponsible. They wielded a great deal of power in this country, and they abused it wholeheartedly. I cannot begin to fathom the so-called logic behind this corporate welfare. Oh wait, it does ring a bell though. I do seem to recall from my encounter with the government that the policy is this: If you do the wrong thing, and then sit on your ass and ask the government to pay your bills, they’ve got your back. If you do the right thing, they’ve got nothing for ya.
I am now flipping burgers again, for $7.25 an hour. There’s no construction work to be done, and I’m lucky to even have this job, or so they tell me. Funny, I don’t feel lucky. Hundreds of dollars worth of tools sit rusting in my carport, useless. Bank executives continue to jet around in private planes, flaunting their billions, OUR billions, in our faces, and every time I ask ‘Would you like fries with that?’ another little piece of my soul dies.
A couple of months ago, out of the blue, the interest rates on our credit cards doubled, and the limits were lowered to just above the balance. We hadn’t done anything different; we still paid all those bills on time, as hard as it’s been. When we asked them why, they told us it was because the economy was bad and other people weren’t paying their bills, so they had to make up the money somewhere. I’m not kidding. They outright admitted that, I have it in writing. Are they serious? Do they honestly think that after all these years of faithfully paying those payments, doing what we’re supposed to do, that they can turn on us, ruin our credit rating, cause the economy to collapse, in turn costing me my livelihood, and we’re going to cover their asses? I don’t think so. No sir, not me. We kept up our end of the deal, but what they’re trying to do to us now amounts to extortion. They’ll never see another penny from us. Guess that little plan backfired, huh?
Now the new administration in Washington is throwing more money at them. I can’t even believe it. It boggles the mind. I filed my taxes last week. They want another $700 from me. They taxed the everloving hell out of my husband all year, but it’s not enough. They want more, more, more! Those banks have got to get their money!
Well, they’re not getting it from me. I get taxed every time I turn around, and I’ve given all I’m going to give. I don’t even let my lazy brother-in-law freeload off of us; I’m certainly not supporting a bunch of billionaire bankers. No. Hell no.
I have had enough.
I think a lot of people have had enough of this. It is our duty as American citizens to keep the federal government in check. When they get too big for their britches, it’s our job to even the playing field. This has nothing to do with political parties or social issues. Forget all those differences between Republicans and Democrats, Libertarians and Independents. It doesn’t matter if you disagree with me about gay marriage or censorship. Nobody’s going to care who’s sleeping with whom, or who’s reading what if we’re all struggling just to feed ourselves! Uncle Sam has his hand in all our pockets, stealing from the poor to give to the rich. It’s time we come together as Americans, stand as one and put the old men in Washington in their place. Their job is to serve the people of this country, to represent what we want. And I don’t think anybody wants to work to support giant corporations who should have gone under due to their own negligence and poor business practices. Instead of being led like sheep to the slaughter, let us all stand up and let them know how we feel about this. I know I won’t be handing out any more money for them to waste this year. And on April 15th, I’ll be protesting as loudly as possible. We should all be doing that.
All those in favor, say aye!
Monday, March 23, 2009
One Small Step
We the people, of the United States of America, have been spoiled rotten. We can walk into a supermarket in January and buy fresh tomatoes, corn, and just about anything else we desire. They’re tasteless and covered in pesticides, but hey, we can eat them all year long!
Up until well in to the twentieth century, you could only eat produce that was in season, and grew locally. Before the invention of the supermarket in this country children often received an orange in their Christmas stocking. It was an exotic treat from a faraway land, and it was priced as such. Tomatoes were grown in the summer, and what wasn’t eaten fresh was canned for winter. Now the finest restaurants in the country feature a “seasonal menu”. Apparently, what used to be the only choice (eating what’s available at the time and grown locally) is now a high-priced luxury.
The amazing thing is you don’t have to shell out big bucks to eat like a gourmet. You can do it every day. Grow your own produce. Think you don’t have enough space? You’d be surprised at the abundance of food a tiny plot will bear. I used to cook for a local soup kitchen that had its own community garden. Participants each had their own small plot in which they could grow whatever they liked, as long as no chemicals were used. They just had to donate 40% of the crop to the soup kitchen. During the summer that I worked there, I had so much fresh food to work with, I couldn’t use it all! And I was feeding an average of forty people a day. I stayed busy making tomato sauces and snapping beans to freeze for the winter. I still ended up handing out a lot of it to the patrons so it wouldn't go bad before I could store it properly.
With hydroponics, container gardening and old fashioned “plant it in the ground” gardening, there’s a way for everyone to provide at least some of their own food. You can grow potatoes in trash cans, for heaven’s sake! Live in an apartment? Check to see if there is a community garden like the one we had.
Sure it’s convenient to just run in the grocery store and grab what you want. But is it worth it? Well let’s see.
According to officials in Florida, if you’ve eaten a tomato this winter from the store, you’ve eaten one picked by a slave. That’s right, a slave. An article in the March 2009 issue of Gourmet magazine outlines the plight of Mariano Lucas Domingo, a Guatemalan man held in virtual slavery for two and a half years. He picked tomatoes; his captor took the money he earned. Over $55,000 all told, not to mention the abuse he endured. He is one of over a thousand men and women freed by law enforcement since 1997. These are just the cases that were prosecuted.
How do those tomatoes taste now? Still ok? Then consider this: We’re in a recession, headed for a depression. The last time that happened, in the 1930s, many people couldn’t afford food. They stood in line for a bowl of soup. But not everyone had to do that. A good many families lived in rural communities and practiced subsistence farming. They had a few chickens, maybe a milk cow, some pigs, and of course, a vegetable garden. The stock market may seem to affect everything in the world, but it doesn’t stop plants from growing, and these families were able to survive no matter what was happening on Wall Street. How many people do you know that do that now?
The 1930 U.S. Census reports a population of 122 million. Today, it’s 306 million. That’s a whole lot more people in front of you in the soup line, because almost none of that number produces any of their own food.
I’m not saying we should all eat only what we can grow. I’m saying that the cost of food is rising all the time, to an almost shocking amount. The less you have to buy, the better you’ll be able to withstand the depression that is steadily bearing down upon us. The fuel costs of transporting food across the country are astronomical, another reason to buy locally at the very least. If you can’t possibly grow anything yourself, please head to the farmer’s market instead of the supermarket. It’s not that far out of your way.
We don’t know how bad things will get this time, but one thing is certain; if there’s food growing in your backyard, you won’t starve.
Up until well in to the twentieth century, you could only eat produce that was in season, and grew locally. Before the invention of the supermarket in this country children often received an orange in their Christmas stocking. It was an exotic treat from a faraway land, and it was priced as such. Tomatoes were grown in the summer, and what wasn’t eaten fresh was canned for winter. Now the finest restaurants in the country feature a “seasonal menu”. Apparently, what used to be the only choice (eating what’s available at the time and grown locally) is now a high-priced luxury.
The amazing thing is you don’t have to shell out big bucks to eat like a gourmet. You can do it every day. Grow your own produce. Think you don’t have enough space? You’d be surprised at the abundance of food a tiny plot will bear. I used to cook for a local soup kitchen that had its own community garden. Participants each had their own small plot in which they could grow whatever they liked, as long as no chemicals were used. They just had to donate 40% of the crop to the soup kitchen. During the summer that I worked there, I had so much fresh food to work with, I couldn’t use it all! And I was feeding an average of forty people a day. I stayed busy making tomato sauces and snapping beans to freeze for the winter. I still ended up handing out a lot of it to the patrons so it wouldn't go bad before I could store it properly.
With hydroponics, container gardening and old fashioned “plant it in the ground” gardening, there’s a way for everyone to provide at least some of their own food. You can grow potatoes in trash cans, for heaven’s sake! Live in an apartment? Check to see if there is a community garden like the one we had.
Sure it’s convenient to just run in the grocery store and grab what you want. But is it worth it? Well let’s see.
According to officials in Florida, if you’ve eaten a tomato this winter from the store, you’ve eaten one picked by a slave. That’s right, a slave. An article in the March 2009 issue of Gourmet magazine outlines the plight of Mariano Lucas Domingo, a Guatemalan man held in virtual slavery for two and a half years. He picked tomatoes; his captor took the money he earned. Over $55,000 all told, not to mention the abuse he endured. He is one of over a thousand men and women freed by law enforcement since 1997. These are just the cases that were prosecuted.
How do those tomatoes taste now? Still ok? Then consider this: We’re in a recession, headed for a depression. The last time that happened, in the 1930s, many people couldn’t afford food. They stood in line for a bowl of soup. But not everyone had to do that. A good many families lived in rural communities and practiced subsistence farming. They had a few chickens, maybe a milk cow, some pigs, and of course, a vegetable garden. The stock market may seem to affect everything in the world, but it doesn’t stop plants from growing, and these families were able to survive no matter what was happening on Wall Street. How many people do you know that do that now?
The 1930 U.S. Census reports a population of 122 million. Today, it’s 306 million. That’s a whole lot more people in front of you in the soup line, because almost none of that number produces any of their own food.
I’m not saying we should all eat only what we can grow. I’m saying that the cost of food is rising all the time, to an almost shocking amount. The less you have to buy, the better you’ll be able to withstand the depression that is steadily bearing down upon us. The fuel costs of transporting food across the country are astronomical, another reason to buy locally at the very least. If you can’t possibly grow anything yourself, please head to the farmer’s market instead of the supermarket. It’s not that far out of your way.
We don’t know how bad things will get this time, but one thing is certain; if there’s food growing in your backyard, you won’t starve.
God's Plan
Country singer Martina McBride recently gave an interview to Out.com, an online magazine for and/or about gays. She encouraged her fans to be tolerant of homosexuality and to embrace the differences in people. She also said that’s what she teaches her children. You can just imagine the hate-filled venom that spewed from the mouths of conservative fans. As usual, they have God backing them up. I’m not a Christian, I’m Buddhist, but let’s assume for our purposes here that the God of western religions does exist. These are some of the comments (in italics) found on message boards after Martina spoke.
"The Almighty GOD created Adam & Eve and not Adam & Steve,"
Of course he did! He was trying to start a new species. Adam and Steve might’ve kept Eden looking like a Better Homes and Gardens cover, but populating the earth would’ve been beyond their capabilities. Well in case you people haven’t noticed, the earth has been populated for quite some time now. In fact, it’s overpopulated. Here are a couple more oft-cited mantras of Christians:
“The Lord works in mysterious ways.”
“God has a plan.”
Did it ever cross your narrow little mind that homosexuality IS God’s plan? It’s a form of population control. If a certain percentage of people are born without the desire to fornicate with the opposite sex, it could certainly slow down birth rates. Being the loving God you claim he is, he wouldn’t want this select few to be deprived of love, affection, and companionship, now would he? The only alternative to opposite sex is same sex. Pretty smart.
Another comment for Martina reads:
"She (along with all other parents) MUST teach their children that turning gay is a CHOICE and is not acceptable in today's society,"
Who told you it’s a choice? You might like to think it’s voluntary, but you have no proof of that whatsoever. Having closely observed a gay relative from birth, I think at least some people are born that way. No doubt in my mind. And most importantly, “all parents MUST teach their children” this outdated backward school of thought? Really?? Who died and made you God? You, and the Church you learned this nonsense from, have no more authority than I do! I imagine you also have less education. So I, with the same authority you profess (but with facts to back me up), have decreed that you must teach your children that organized religion is corrupt, and that Jesus of Nazareth would shit a holy brick if he knew of the atrocities the church has committed in his name.
By the way, what are these people doing reading Out.com?
Here’s what I think. There are too many people on earth now, we can’t feed them all. I believe there is some intelligent force at work in the universe, but I think it’s something we probably couldn’t even conceive of, much less fully understand. I just call it Mother Nature. And Mother Nature has a lot of tricks up her sleeve to deal with various problems. Natural disasters (which seem to occur most often in highly populated, poverty-stricken places like China, Brazil, and Southeast Asia) are a quick remedy to overpopulation, so perhaps homosexuality is more of a long-term solution. Who knows? It certainly makes more sense than the idea that a person would willfully choose to be gay, in effect choosing to be ostracized, ridiculed, and deprived of rights in a society run by holier-than-thou, bible-thumping bigots.
The truth is, gays aren’t hurting anyone, and if they’re not affecting you, why do you care? They’re not asking you to be gay. Maybe you’re right, and they’ll go straight to hell, but that’s not your problem is it? So mind your own damn business.
Here’s a bible quote for you:
“Judge not, lest ye be judged yourself.”
"The Almighty GOD created Adam & Eve and not Adam & Steve,"
Of course he did! He was trying to start a new species. Adam and Steve might’ve kept Eden looking like a Better Homes and Gardens cover, but populating the earth would’ve been beyond their capabilities. Well in case you people haven’t noticed, the earth has been populated for quite some time now. In fact, it’s overpopulated. Here are a couple more oft-cited mantras of Christians:
“The Lord works in mysterious ways.”
“God has a plan.”
Did it ever cross your narrow little mind that homosexuality IS God’s plan? It’s a form of population control. If a certain percentage of people are born without the desire to fornicate with the opposite sex, it could certainly slow down birth rates. Being the loving God you claim he is, he wouldn’t want this select few to be deprived of love, affection, and companionship, now would he? The only alternative to opposite sex is same sex. Pretty smart.
Another comment for Martina reads:
"She (along with all other parents) MUST teach their children that turning gay is a CHOICE and is not acceptable in today's society,"
Who told you it’s a choice? You might like to think it’s voluntary, but you have no proof of that whatsoever. Having closely observed a gay relative from birth, I think at least some people are born that way. No doubt in my mind. And most importantly, “all parents MUST teach their children” this outdated backward school of thought? Really?? Who died and made you God? You, and the Church you learned this nonsense from, have no more authority than I do! I imagine you also have less education. So I, with the same authority you profess (but with facts to back me up), have decreed that you must teach your children that organized religion is corrupt, and that Jesus of Nazareth would shit a holy brick if he knew of the atrocities the church has committed in his name.
By the way, what are these people doing reading Out.com?
Here’s what I think. There are too many people on earth now, we can’t feed them all. I believe there is some intelligent force at work in the universe, but I think it’s something we probably couldn’t even conceive of, much less fully understand. I just call it Mother Nature. And Mother Nature has a lot of tricks up her sleeve to deal with various problems. Natural disasters (which seem to occur most often in highly populated, poverty-stricken places like China, Brazil, and Southeast Asia) are a quick remedy to overpopulation, so perhaps homosexuality is more of a long-term solution. Who knows? It certainly makes more sense than the idea that a person would willfully choose to be gay, in effect choosing to be ostracized, ridiculed, and deprived of rights in a society run by holier-than-thou, bible-thumping bigots.
The truth is, gays aren’t hurting anyone, and if they’re not affecting you, why do you care? They’re not asking you to be gay. Maybe you’re right, and they’ll go straight to hell, but that’s not your problem is it? So mind your own damn business.
Here’s a bible quote for you:
“Judge not, lest ye be judged yourself.”
Saturday, March 21, 2009
The Darwin Act
I would like to suggest some new legislation. I want to call it “The Darwin Act”. Under my new act, any law which has the sole purpose of saving a person from their own stupidity would be taken off the books.
You see, human beings had to be pretty intelligent to get where we are today, from living in caves to building great civilizations, world wonders, making music, art, science. These things took brains. If you were one of those cave people, survival of the fittest was the name of the game. Now “fittest” doesn’t necessarily mean “strongest”. It means you have the ability to adapt to any situation. It also means you have to stay alive long enough to procreate! If you were stupid, you got eaten by a giant cave bear, and you didn’t get to pass on your genes. This way of life quickly weeded out the weak-minded and weak-willed, producing a species that got smarter with every generation. Hence, humanity’s great accomplishments.
What we have now is the complete opposite. We are devolving. Every time a new law passes that protects the idiots from themselves, we get just a little dumber.
When you save an idiot from himself, be it with seat belt laws, drug laws, food laws, you keep him in the gene pool.
Take for instance the Arkansas law that prohibits keeping an alligator in your bathtub. Does this happen often enough that they had to pass a law to prevent it? It probably does. Anyone who keeps a man-eating giant lizard in the tub NEEDS to be eaten by said lizard. You, Gator Man, out of the gene pool now!
That’s just one of many, many such laws designed to keep people from doing something that is so obviously dangerous and stupid that there shouldn’t need to be a law telling you not to do it. I mean, do you really have to tell people in Florida not to have sex with a porcupine? At least one person must have thought this was a good idea, or no one would’ve thought to make a law against it. If you don’t have even the tiny little shred of common sense it requires to know better than to screw a porcupine, of all things, you deserve whatever you get. Which I sincerely hope is the loss of the ability to make babies. Let these people go about their business and eventually they’ll weed themselves out. Society as a whole will be better for it.
You see, human beings had to be pretty intelligent to get where we are today, from living in caves to building great civilizations, world wonders, making music, art, science. These things took brains. If you were one of those cave people, survival of the fittest was the name of the game. Now “fittest” doesn’t necessarily mean “strongest”. It means you have the ability to adapt to any situation. It also means you have to stay alive long enough to procreate! If you were stupid, you got eaten by a giant cave bear, and you didn’t get to pass on your genes. This way of life quickly weeded out the weak-minded and weak-willed, producing a species that got smarter with every generation. Hence, humanity’s great accomplishments.
What we have now is the complete opposite. We are devolving. Every time a new law passes that protects the idiots from themselves, we get just a little dumber.
When you save an idiot from himself, be it with seat belt laws, drug laws, food laws, you keep him in the gene pool.
Take for instance the Arkansas law that prohibits keeping an alligator in your bathtub. Does this happen often enough that they had to pass a law to prevent it? It probably does. Anyone who keeps a man-eating giant lizard in the tub NEEDS to be eaten by said lizard. You, Gator Man, out of the gene pool now!
That’s just one of many, many such laws designed to keep people from doing something that is so obviously dangerous and stupid that there shouldn’t need to be a law telling you not to do it. I mean, do you really have to tell people in Florida not to have sex with a porcupine? At least one person must have thought this was a good idea, or no one would’ve thought to make a law against it. If you don’t have even the tiny little shred of common sense it requires to know better than to screw a porcupine, of all things, you deserve whatever you get. Which I sincerely hope is the loss of the ability to make babies. Let these people go about their business and eventually they’ll weed themselves out. Society as a whole will be better for it.
Sin Tax
So I went to buy a pack of cigarettes the other day. Yes, yes. Smoking is bad, I know. I’ve been doing it for twenty years. I’m not ready to quit yet, may not ever be. I cough a lot, and I don’t have much stamina anymore, but I’m worried that if I quit I’ll gain a gross amount of weight. Although vanity is a big part of that, being fat is also bad for your health. In fact, heart disease (much of it caused by obesity) is the Number One Killer of Americans! So I have to worry about that as well. And worrying, of course, just makes me smoke more. So I’ve stopped thinking about it entirely.
Back to my point. I’m buying this pack of Marlboros, and the cashier says, “That’s $4.51.” Say what?
“Say what?” I cried.
“New tax. Sixty cents a pack.”
“Holy ghost on a piece of toast.” I say, leaving with my ridiculously overpriced package.
This is not the first time smokers have been targeted for a new tax. It seems that every time our illustrious government gets a little tight on money, they roll out a new cigarette tax. I can just hear them up there in Washington:
“All right, we have to come up with some more money guys. The Chinese are going to come over here and break our legs!”
“Oh, oh, I know! We’ll tax the smokers again. They’re the scum of society, nobody will care! And if anyone complains, it’ll look like they condone smoking. It’s foolproof!”
“Great idea, Bob. Let’s do it.”
The government and the media have done such a good job of demonizing smoking, that no matter what they do to us now, they can feel justified. They reason that if smoking is too expensive, maybe we’ll quit. And if we don’t, well, that’s just more money in the coffers. Smoking causes all kinds of health problems, putting a strain on our healthcare system. These people should be made to pay for that. Everybody wins. Right?
Here’s the thing. I know it’s bad for me. But I am an adult. I’m not a child that needs to be scolded for doing something dangerous, or a sheep to be protected by the shepherd. If I want to smoke, damn it, that’s my business! The very idea of being “punished” by the government (you know, the one that’s supposed to represent me) makes me want to choke somebody. Who do they think they are? It’s my body. Of all the things that a free citizen should have, complete control over what goes into, or comes out of, one’s body is numero uno in my book.
Costing the healthcare system, am I? I don’t think so. Odds are I won’t live to retirement age, much less to eighty or ninety. This means I won’t be drawing off social security, Medicare, or my children for twenty-five years after I stop being productive. If I get lung cancer, I have insurance. Even if I didn’t, there’s only so much they can do for you. Make you comfortable mostly. The price of a boatload of morphine doesn’t add up to the cost of twenty or more years of bad health caused by aging.
With this in mind, I propose we implement a tax break for smokers. Drinkers of alcohol and double cheeseburger eaters too! We should be rewarded for taking ourselves out of the game early, leaving more resources for the next generation. We’re doing the country a favor. So treat us like the self-sacrificing heroes we are, not naughty little children who need to be taught a lesson.
Back to my point. I’m buying this pack of Marlboros, and the cashier says, “That’s $4.51.” Say what?
“Say what?” I cried.
“New tax. Sixty cents a pack.”
“Holy ghost on a piece of toast.” I say, leaving with my ridiculously overpriced package.
This is not the first time smokers have been targeted for a new tax. It seems that every time our illustrious government gets a little tight on money, they roll out a new cigarette tax. I can just hear them up there in Washington:
“All right, we have to come up with some more money guys. The Chinese are going to come over here and break our legs!”
“Oh, oh, I know! We’ll tax the smokers again. They’re the scum of society, nobody will care! And if anyone complains, it’ll look like they condone smoking. It’s foolproof!”
“Great idea, Bob. Let’s do it.”
The government and the media have done such a good job of demonizing smoking, that no matter what they do to us now, they can feel justified. They reason that if smoking is too expensive, maybe we’ll quit. And if we don’t, well, that’s just more money in the coffers. Smoking causes all kinds of health problems, putting a strain on our healthcare system. These people should be made to pay for that. Everybody wins. Right?
Here’s the thing. I know it’s bad for me. But I am an adult. I’m not a child that needs to be scolded for doing something dangerous, or a sheep to be protected by the shepherd. If I want to smoke, damn it, that’s my business! The very idea of being “punished” by the government (you know, the one that’s supposed to represent me) makes me want to choke somebody. Who do they think they are? It’s my body. Of all the things that a free citizen should have, complete control over what goes into, or comes out of, one’s body is numero uno in my book.
Costing the healthcare system, am I? I don’t think so. Odds are I won’t live to retirement age, much less to eighty or ninety. This means I won’t be drawing off social security, Medicare, or my children for twenty-five years after I stop being productive. If I get lung cancer, I have insurance. Even if I didn’t, there’s only so much they can do for you. Make you comfortable mostly. The price of a boatload of morphine doesn’t add up to the cost of twenty or more years of bad health caused by aging.
With this in mind, I propose we implement a tax break for smokers. Drinkers of alcohol and double cheeseburger eaters too! We should be rewarded for taking ourselves out of the game early, leaving more resources for the next generation. We’re doing the country a favor. So treat us like the self-sacrificing heroes we are, not naughty little children who need to be taught a lesson.
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